A Tradition of Love and Respect
On Nkombo Island in Rusizi District, Rwanda, women proudly speak about a cultural tradition that shows love and respect for their husbands. This tradition involves washing their husbands’ feet or body, which they say is a symbol of deep care and devotion.
Women in Nkombo explained that this is not seen as a burden but rather an act of affection, passed down from older generations. They emphasize that washing their husbands is part of their identity and strengthens their relationships.
Learn more about Rwandan cultural traditions
Stories From Nkombo Women
“It Is a Sign of Love”
One woman explained how this practice makes her happy:
“Sometimes I wash my husband’s whole body when he is too tired. Other times, I simply wash his feet. For me, it is love and I cannot refuse to do it.”
She added that she inherited this tradition from her parents and does not see it as old-fashioned or colonial but as a positive family culture.
Generational Changes
Another woman admitted that while older generations still practice it, many young women today no longer continue the custom.
“We used to do it, but the younger generation does not keep it alive anymore,” she said.
What Husbands Say About the Tradition
Husbands in Nkombo also expressed joy and appreciation when their wives care for them in this way.
“It Reminds Me of My Mother”
One man recalled:
“My mother used to wash my father’s feet. Now, my wife does the same, and it makes me happy. She sometimes washes my feet, and I see it as love.”
Another added:
“When a wife washes her husband, it shows they love each other. My wife does it often, and I feel respected.”
Older Couples Keep It Alive
A 50-year-old man proudly shared that his wife has been washing his feet for years:
“When I come home tired or drunk, my wife helps me wash. It shows how much she cares for me.”
Hard Work and Gender Roles on the Island
Life on Nkombo Island is demanding. Women often carry heavy loads, farm the land, and manage households, while men usually engage in fishing. Despite the hard work, many women say they still find joy in taking time to honor their husbands through this cultural act.
For more stories on gender roles in Rwanda, visit our society section.
Keeping the Culture Alive
While some see the tradition fading among the youth, many women on Nkombo remain proud to continue it. They view it not only as an old practice but also as a living expression of respect and family unity.
The question remains whether this tradition will survive as younger generations adopt more modern lifestyles, but for now, many families in Nkombo say it continues to bring them closer together.
